It is only two weeks, but the pain in my heart is so deep and the tears don't stop falling. I miss you so much. I can't believe you are gone.
It was over three years from my last dog Rocky when I decided to volunteer in a no kill shelter. After a few weeks of walking these beautiful animals, each of which I wanted to bring home, you arrived. You were only six weeks old and so adorable.
I never had a puppy before. Rocky was six months old when he joined the family. I fell in love with you the minute I held you and you put your paws around me and gave me a big hug.
The minute you walked into the house you took over, with a pep in your step and your gorgeous face. You were loved by all. In a week's time you mastered how to get around the house, both in and out. You would go into the yard and up the porch stairs, knocking on pop's door so you could get onto the second floor. Every gate I put up you jumped over or knocked down.
You were smart and relentless, but so loving, always so sweet. You started out in a crate, and when you did something wrong (eating a shoe-lol) you would go in the cage and punish yourself.
It didn't take long for you to master the house-training skills. As soon as that happened I grabbed you out of the crate and put you in the bed with me, where you slept for 12 years.
You learned everything so fast and did things that amazed everyone who met you. "She has human eyes," they would say, "a soul." You talked. You said "mama" and "I want some."
You opened the refrigerator for carrots. I miss when I would get on the floor and open the carrot drawer and you would put your head in the drawer and I would put mine next to you and you would look at me and give me a kiss. You were always full of kisses and so affectionate to everyone.
You knocked on the closet every night at bedtime to get your blanket, which you would drag and jump up to put on the bed. You would carry the mail for me from upstairs to downstairs. The size of the box never mattered. You were always so proud. The mail was your job, as the most important part was the treat that awaited you.
When I had to shower you, it wasn't your favorite thing, but when it was over you immediately would go to where the treats were. You would do anything for a treat.
Your morning breakfast routine was after I fed you, you would race upstairs, waiting for nana and pop to finish with their breakfast so you could have the last licks. lol And if they weren't awake yet you would stay outside the bedroom waiting, more like staring them down, until they woke up.
You were gentle and kind to all dogs, even little bugs. If I made a certain sound you would know it was bug time. You would race in get the bug, gently place it in your paws, and then put it down where I could finish the task. :)
You loved balls and toys. When I would say "Frankie, two toys," you would search around, find a ball and a toy and bring them to me, and you would take a cloth and then the ball and pop it out like a baseball game. The list is endless because you were an extremely intelligent and special girl.
What I miss the most, besides all the things you did and all the laughs and love you gave me, is the night time. At night I would hold you, you would put your paw around me and bury your head in my chest as I told you about my day or cried if I had a bad one. Afterwards I would pet you and pray my prayers and fall asleep.
In the morning, you would be in your spot and me in mine, but that spot is empty now. At night you are not there for me to love and hold.
I miss you, my sweet girl, so much. My heart is so empty. I don't know when it will ever feel whole again. I love you and miss you. I hope you can see me and see how much I love you and how much I miss you.
Love me always.