My Big Boy
It's been 7 months and not one day has passed that I have not thought of you. Most of those involved a tear, or many, with such overwhelming grief. Know that I am not afraid of death anymore because I know when I go I will meet you at the bridge and we will be happy once again.
Dad misses you, Jake hurts still and Chloe is lonely without her best friend, as I am too.
I miss your howling when dinner wasn't prompt. I miss your silly noises in the middle of the night and your rituals. I miss you putting your huge head on my shoulder as if to say "yeah I know and it'll all be ok as long as we have one another."
I have never loved a dog as much as I love you, Otis. Although our time together wasn't long and I feel cheated, I cherish every moment and I am sorry I didn't realize what you were going through. I know now that phobias are serious. I still blame myself for you being gone.
I love you, sweet angel. Wait for me and send me a sign please, because Mommy misses you and would give anything to have you back.
If there was ever a time I needed you, it's right now, and I know you would know exactly why.