(Raleigh, NC, USA)
On April 1, 2015, the keeper of my heart left this world. I am devastated that Lucy is not on her couch, on the bed, waiting at the door for me.
Lucy, I am so sorry if -- when -- I ever failed you and took you for granted. I am so sorry you got sick and suffered, and went blind. I know you were miserable and afraid.
I tried to help you through it, but I could see in your face, with its anxious frown, that you didn't know what happened and why.
Then the cancer made your last day so painful and I knew that I couldn't let you suffer any more, even though I wanted to move heaven and earth to keep you with me.
But I want you back! I will never stop missing you and thinking of you and wishing for you. My hope now is that I will see you in the hereafter.... that is my idea of heaven -- you and me together again.
Together, we will go the lake, to the store, to see QueQue, and Izzie, and go swimming and play with Tedddiiee, and eat treats, and take snoozie-snoozes, and sleep together side by side, your face nestled eternally into mine.
Lucy, I love you so so much, papita.