Even More Advice and Comments About Dog Behaviour and Training

Here are the final 20 dog quotes about behaviour and training. Professional dog trainers wrote some of them. Others are comments and anecdotes about dog behavior. Others still are quips from comedians.

There are two other pages of quotations. Click on the links at the bottom of the page to view them.

The old saw about old dogs and new tricks only applies to certain people.

Daniel Pinkwater,
Train Your Dog, Dammit!

Dogs are not people dressed up in fur coats, and to deny them their nature is to do them great harm.

Jeanne Schinto

First you learn a new language, profanity; and second you learn not to discipline your dogs when you're mad, and that's most of the time when you're training dogs.

Lou Schultz

Hunger and fear are the only realities in dog life: an empty stomach makes a fierce dog.

Robert F. Scott

The dog is almost human in its demand for living interest, yet fatally less than human in its inability to foresee.

Robert F. Scott

The dog lives for the day, the hour, even the moment.

Robert F. Scott

My dog watches me on TV. So, if I may take this opportunity, "No! No! No!"

Garry Shandling

Though he had very little Latin beyond "Cave canem," he had, as a young dog, devoured Shakespeare (in a tasty leather binding).

Dodie Smith,
101 Dalmatians

The difference between "trained OK" and "trained perfectly" doesn't really matter all that much to me. I once did a film with Lassie. When that dog got excited he jumped all over Rudd Weatherwax [Lassie's trainer]. Now that's the smartest dog in the world. If the world's best-trained dog can jump around to show he's happy then my dogs should be allowed to do the same.

Jimmy Stewart

My dogs have never been good at things like "sit," "stay," or even "come." I think that we've given the tourists a few laughs, especially when the dogs hit the end of their leashes hard enough to drag Gloria down the street.

Jimmy Stewart, about his two golden retrievers and his mutts, and his wife, Gloria

A well-trained dog will make no attempt to share your lunch. He will just make you feel so guilty that you cannot enjoy it.

Helen Thomson

The dog, on the other hand, has few or no ideas because his brain acts in coarse fashion and because there are few connections with each single process.

Edward Thorndike

I have consolidated all James Thurber dog quotes on one page.

The final lesson took a while
But finally she understood
"Is it three days, not counting hols?
Then come and meet me in the wood."

I've sold her now a dozen times
And she's had twelve enormous bones
She stays with them three working days
The cheque has cleared—then she runs home!

Unknown Author

The first rule in successful dog training is to be smarter than the dog. Which is why some breeds are easier to train than others.

Unknown Author

You can't expect to be a "lucky dog" if you spend all your time growling.

Unknown Author

You can't keep a good man down—or an overly affectionate dog.

Unknown Author

A blind person walking down Yonge Street in Toronto commanded his dog to turn right to what he thought was the subway entrance. He had miscalculated and found himself completely disoriented in a dead-end alley. A passerby saw his dilemma and asked if he could help. 

"Yes, thank you," said the blind man, "I was trying to get to the subway." 

The man leaned over to the dog and said slowly and distinctly into the dog's ear, "Take... him... to... the... subway."

Unknown guide dog trainer, reporting the story as told to him

Humans are aware of very little, the artificial brainy side of life, the worries and bills and the mechanisms of jobs, the doltish psychologies we've placed over our lives like a stencil. A dog keeps his life simple and unadorned. He is who he is, and his only task is to assert this.

Brad Watson,
The Last Days of the Dog-Men

I have a spaniel that defrocked a nun last week. He took hold of the cord. I had hold of the leash. It was like elephants holding tails. Imagine me undressing a nun, even second hand.

E.B. White

All Dobermans should be named "Einstein." Well, perhaps that's too lavish praise. They're a bit weak on mathematics, but they certainly could earn a Ph.D. in any other subject.

Morton Wilson, dog trainer

I have consolidated all Barbara Woodhouse dog quotes onto one page.

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